This is the beginning of a series of letters to a friend on how to sabbatical effectively. I share my strategies, successes and challenges, and insights I gleaned during this time. Even if you don’t have an extended period as she did, these tips should be helpful as you navigate periods of stepping away and developing your own insights about navigating life.

Kim,

As you know, I grew up in Southern California, and as a child, I loved going to the beach and playing in the ocean. Body surfing was the best. Jumping into the wave and taking it for a ride was exhilarating when a massive wave caught me by surprise. Tumbling, trying not to gulp water and sand, and wondering if I’d come back up usually ended my enthusiasm for the ocean. Well, for at least a half hour.

That endless spinning was how the last half of 2023 and the first part of 2024 felt. And just like the unexpected wave, it caught me by surprise. After a day of calls, I was exhausted and not looking forward to the work I had previously loved. I was still grieving the loss of my mom and dealing with the fallout of other challenges we faced. When I had an emergency appendectomy and was thinking, “Can I have another?” as I enjoyed a week of doing nothing without guilt, that was the final red flag. 

I felt God saying, “Take a break.” Patrick did so the year prior, and I witnessed the clarity it brought him. And rest. He was a different person afterward. I wanted that. So, after much prayer, I decided on a three-month hiatus. I would only coach on two back-to-back days a month. That would allow 30 days to rest and explore new territory between “working periods.”
Sabbaticals are not just extended vacations. They are about gaining clarity and new insights for living.

I had wholeheartedly planned to write during the sabbatical but never wanted to. The thought of it exhausted me. Even coaching just two days a month in May and June was tiring. I was done. Patrick and I would say, “Dobry done,” which is our made-up corollary to “Dobry den” for our Slavic friends. It means kaput, finished; there is no more to give.

I could list several things I was done with but I’m sure you get it. Done with certain aspects of technology, done with the vitriol, done with double messaging from so many sources, etc. I longed to return to what I knew to be true. That amounted to only three things in that moment: My love of Jesus, my love for my husband, and the words in the scriptures. Everything else felt like noise.

There are Many Reasons to Step Back

For me, this season was about stepping back. Stepping back from

  • All the “shoulds.”
  • Responsibilities I’ve had for a long time that I needed to determine if they are still part of my purpose
  • Being so focused on efficiency and productivity that I wasn’t able to slow down and see some of the important things around me
  • The continuous need to go faster and faster, which can cause a level of anxiety
  • Meeting a lot of expectations (including my own) that I wasn’t sure I was supposed to meet
  • Preconceived notions of my talents and giftings

Stepping away allowed me to explore where God wanted me to put my time and attention and seek His direction. Once rested, I noticed what truly brought joy, what I looked forward to, what I dreaded. When you are too close to the problem, sometimes you just need to back up to see it more clearly. You may have other reasons as well. These are just mine.

I needed the time for my body and spirit to rest after 45 years of continual work. But a sabbatical is WAY MORE THAN REST. Had I stopped my sabbatical when I felt “rested up,” like, after a really good vacation, I probably would have thrown myself back into my old schedule. And I would have likely wound up exhausted again within a year.

How Much Time Is Needed?

The key was pursuing key objectives, which included rest and clarity before I returned to my business. Is three months always the correct length? I doubt it. For some, it is probably less. For others, it could be more.

I advise blocking as much time as feasibly possible and protecting it. Protect it from others wanting you to do things “now that you have time.” Protect it from wanting to complete unfinished projects around the house. The one thing you want to do is to stay focused on why you are taking your sabbatical.

How to identify your sabbatical objectives will be the topic of my next letter.

 

 

  • To improve your results: Subscribe to our exclusive quarterly newsletter to get the latest leadership expertise, engagement know-how, and more.

    Receive expert insights and advice from BONSAI Founder and President Loriana Sekarski as she introduces new ways to capitalize on your strengths — improving your organization’s performance as well as your satisfaction and personal effectiveness. Loriana’s how-to articles spotlight solutions to problems leaders like you face. Don’t miss out; sign up today.

    Loriana Sekarski is founder and president of BONSAI, a consulting company that transforms leaders (and businesses) into the best version of themselves. As a leadership coach, Loriana teaches leaders how to hone soft skills, spur workplace engagement, and achieve untapped levels of potential. Outside of BONSAI, Loriana serves as an adjunct professor at Washington University’s graduate student program. Additionally, she's fine-tuning her passion project, TakeFlight, a division of BONSAI that launches organizations, churches, and marriages to boldly live out their purpose by leveraging their strengths to achieve their God-given destiny. TakeFlight has just developed Revealing Hidden Shackles, an innovative curriculum that examines domestic violence within the Christian community.